


had some time over

by couldaughter



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 5 Times, First Dates, Friendship, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Violence, Post-Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:47:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24443812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/couldaughter/pseuds/couldaughter
Summary: “Picking up the drinks in exchange? Smart play,” Maddie continued, still sounding worried. “Look, the second anything feels weird, you call me, okay? I won’t mind, and Chimney always loves a chance to be the hero.”Josh grinned. “Oh, offering me your baby daddy as a knight in shining armor? Your pregnancy brain is off the charts, Mads.”“Don’t think it’s kicked in quite yet, jerk,” she replied. Josh could hear her smiling - she was so happy about the baby it would be sickening, if he wasn’t so happyforher.
Relationships: Maddie Buckley & Josh Russo, Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	had some time over

**Author's Note:**

  * For [middlecyclone](https://archiveofourown.org/users/middlecyclone/gifts).



> hello everyone! i watched all three seasons of 911 in the past four days and it has completely infested my brain. this fic will include other pairings, but i'm not going to tag them until they actually appear so... enjoy the suspense i guess?
> 
> many thanks to meg middlecyclone for welcoming four days of insane texts from me about this show. i love it. i love it so much.
> 
> Let Josh Russo Be Happy 2020

“Are you sure about this, Josh?”

Josh knew Maddie’s voice of Gentle Concern pretty well, after everything they’d been through during their friendship, but he was still getting used to how often she was using it on _him_.

“Yes, I’m sure,” he said, shouldering his phone as he considered which shirt to wear. “It’s a nice restaurant, and I bet ten bucks I can get him to pay for both our food. Oh, blue or grey?”

“Grey,” she replied immediately. “Picking up the drinks in exchange? Smart play,” she continued, still sounding worried. “Look, the _second_ anything feels weird, you call me, okay? I won’t mind, and Chimney always loves a chance to be the hero.”

Josh grinned. “Oh, offering me your baby daddy as a knight in shining armor? Your pregnancy brain is off the charts, Mads.”

“Don’t think it’s kicked in quite yet, jerk,” she replied. Josh could hear her smiling - she was so happy about the baby it would be sickening, if he wasn’t so happy _for_ her.

“You got my text with the details for tonight, right?” He winced at the non-sequitur but sue him, he was going to be careful with his first date in months.

“Yes, Josh, I got it. Have a good night, okay? You’re my best friend, I just want you to be safe.”

“I know, Maddie. Thanks.” He gave his tie one last try as the dial tone sounded, growled in frustration, and pulled it off and over his head. His hair was a little less than artfully tousled, but hopefully Kai wouldn’t mind.

* * *

Kai met him at the door to the restaurant at exactly seven o’clock.

“Punctual,” said Josh. “I like that in a man.”

Kai laughed. It grated a little on Josh’s nerves, but it was nice to know he hadn’t totally lost his charms.

“You want a drink before we sit down?” Josh asked casually, gesturing towards the bar. Their table was still being cleared, so they had a few minutes to wait.

“Yeah, that’d be great,” said Kai. “I’ll have, uh, red wine? Anything local, I’m trying to reduce my food miles.”

“A noble goal.”

The bar wasn’t that crowded for a Friday night, so Josh was away with two glasses of wine in just under ten minutes. The bartender winked at him, which was a little weird but also comforting. Maybe she’d remember he was there if — Josh took a deep breath. Kai waved from the table, next to a window with an honest-to-god candle lit in the center.

“This is a really nice place,” said Josh, sliding smoothly into his chair. “Have you been here before?”

Kai toasted him with his glass and took a sip before answering. “Yeah, a few times. My ex really liked it.” He chuckled.

Josh winced slightly. Not the best start to a conversation.

It _was_ a nice restaurant, though, just fancy enough for a first date without being intimidating, and with a decent vegetarian menu that Josh took some time to scrutinise.

“Are you thinking starters?” Kai asked, in a tone which meant ‘I am not paying for starters’.

“No,” Josh replied, glancing over the options again. “I eat enough garlic bread alone on my couch as it is.”

Kai nodded in sympathy and went back to his own menu.

“So,” he said after a few minutes of silent contemplation. “What do you do? I mean, outside of work.”

“Oh, not much,” said Josh. His chest felt tight, suddenly. He didn’t want to talk about work, even in passing. “Uh, I guess I’m kind of married to the job. I spend most of my free time right now watching old seasons of the Great British Baking Show.” He winced. “What about you?”

“I’m a big film buff,” said Kai. He lit up a little, in a way he hadn’t before. He really was handsome, which was a shame, because thinking about movies and dates in the same sentence was not… great.

Josh hummed.

“Yeah, I actually do festival programming for part of my job — it’s super cool getting to source 35mm reels for the older stuff. My ex — Luke — used to work with me, he’s a huge Mel Brooks fan.”

“Oh, really? What kind of events do you do?” Josh asked, attempting to focus. His knuckles were white around the stem of his wine glass.

“Lots of different things, really.” Kai looked thoughtful. “The company I work for takes the contracts. I’ve been doing a lot of outdoor movie stuff recently, y’know, hook up a projector in the park and let the couples bring their own picnic blankets. We really clean up on the refreshments, Luke showed me the spreadsheets. Last time we did Young Frankenstein — it’s his favourite. You seen it?”

Josh knew all about that screening. Before Kai could continue, he was out of his chair and halfway to the restroom.

* * *

The restaurant bathroom was about as nice as the rest of the building, with soft lighting and lights above the mirrors. Josh didn’t notice it at the time, though, because he was pretty busy not being able to breathe.

It had been a really nice date, before Greg dropped the act. It was nice enough that Josh had started idly thinking about what they might do for a second date. And then he got sent to the hospital, and he deleted Tinder again, and he couldn’t think about movies in the park without feeling a punch in the stomach. He put a hand over his heart, feeling it trying to burst out of his chest. Pressed his feet flat against the floor and curled his toes inside his boots. Curled his nails into his right palm until he could feel the whole hand again.

 _Of all the fucking jobs to have,_ he thought. He was furious at Kai, and at himself, and at the universe in general. His fingers shook as he called Maddie.

She picked up on the second ring. He tried not to imagine her waiting by the phone, expecting disaster. “Josh? Are you okay?”

He gasped twice, felt it stutter in his throat, and croaked, “Not really.”

“Are you safe?”

Josh nodded, then remembered. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to breathe deeply. “Uh, yeah. Sorry. Panic attack.” Then he gasped again and scrubbed at his cheeks. They were damp, because he could only embarrass himself in public if he went all the way with it, apparently.

His ears were ringing. He blinked a few times, still gasping, and tried to ignore the way his vision was tunnelling.

“Josh? Josh, I need you to focus on me, okay? I know it’s hard but I really don’t want you to pass out in the restroom. Imagine the dry cleaning bill”

 _What, like I’d be fine with that?_ Josh rubbed at his chest again. It really hurt. He gasped, and kept gasping, throat tight.

Maddie was very good at talking people through panic attacks. He’d heard her do it before a hundred times from across the dispatch center, had done it himself more times than he could count, but it was hard to remember that when he was on the other end of the phone. He kept thinking about lying there on the ground, not knowing why, not knowing if help was coming, not knowing _anything_. He counted with her, and held, and counted out enough times that it felt almost like meditation.

It was maybe ten minutes later that he felt calm enough to say, “Thanks, Maddie.” Imaginary bruises still throbbed, but at least he knew they were imaginary.

“Seriously, Josh, it’s not a problem.” She paused. Josh kept focusing on his breathing, nice and even. “Do you… want to talk about it?”

“Not right now.” His voice surprised him, how wrecked he sounded. “Um, can I come over? I don’t want to ruin your evening.”

“Of course,” said Maddie, as if it wasn’t even a question. “I’ll call you an Uber, okay? Tell your date your pregnant friend needs you. If he says anything you’ll know you can delete his number.”

“I’ll see you soon,” Josh said, and hung up. He looked at his phone for a few seconds, his breath hitching slightly. It was hard, doing things on your own. Even simple things, like standing up, or going on a goddamn first date.

His knees wobbled a little as he opened the stall door and walked to the mirror. He looked pretty awful, as he’d expected, but it was nice to be reminded that for all he could still feel it, his injuries were all healed. A little cold water later, he turned and left.

“Hey, Josh,” said Kai, snapping slightly. “What took you so long?”

Josh cleared his throat. It still felt dry, words a little rough. “I’m really sorry, a friend called while I was in the restroom. I didn’t want to sit across from you on the phone.”

“A good friend? You’d rather be on a date with him right now?” Josh could tell Kai’s feelings were hurt, but he didn’t get how he jumped straight from a thirty minute bathroom break to two-timing.

“No, jackass,” he said, halfway into his jacket. “She’s pregnant. Any health stuff is kind of a big deal.” He raised an eyebrow. “I think you should ask Luke if he wants to pick this up where we left off. Have a nice night.”

He pulled his phone out of his pocket as he pushed the front door of the restaurant open.

 _Maddie [20:15]_ : eta two minutes. see you soon 💖💖💖

Josh smiled on reflex. It was sort of weird, finding your first real best friend in your thirties, but that didn’t mean it was bad. He’d had friends before, the kind you could talk to about almost anything, but never one he’d been through the fire with like Maddie.

The Uber pulled up exactly on time. He sent the safety alert straight to Maddie and leaned back against the headrest, watching the lights of the city pass by the window.

Maddie and Chimney’s place wasn’t far from the restaurant, really, and he found himself outside the apartment almost before he could think about what he was going to _say_. He’d buzzed in, so he didn’t even get the luxury of a minute to gather his thoughts before he knocked.

The door opened to reveal Maddie in PJs and a fluffy dressing gown. She smiled tentatively at him. “Hi,” she said, stepping back to let him in. “How was the taxi?”

“Fine,” said Josh. He made a bee-line for the good armchair and flopped into it with as much drama as he felt it deserved. “How’s Chimney?”

“Chimney is fine,” said the man himself, wandering in from the hallway. He was also in PJs, thankfully including a shirt. “He hopes you’re okay, and is going to stay out of the way for the best friend heart-to-heart you are no doubt about to have.” He kissed Maddie on the cheek and handed Josh the mug he was holding. “It’s hot cocoa. Try not to get snot on the cushions.”

And with that, he was gone. Josh smiled, despite himself.

“He’s a really good man,” he said, quietly. He sank a little further into the cushions. “Even if he does keep threatening me over this chair.”

“Marking his territory,” said Maddie. “He’s still not over walking in on Albert having a one-night-stand on the couch.”

Josh grimaced. “God, really? Kids these days.” He sobered quickly, though, because Maddie had come to sit on the chair next to him, elbows on the armrest, and look at him.

She had very expressive eyes. Currently they were expressing that she knew when someone was stalling for time.

Josh took a sip of cocoa.

Slowly, Maddie reached for his hand. Josh set the mug down and wound their fingers together, like some kind of affectionate Gordian knot. “I asked you earlier, if you wanted to talk about it. Any developments since?”

He felt his eyelids flicker. “Uh, I don’t know if I _want_ to lay out exactly how triggered a guy talking about his job can apparently make me.”

“What was his job?” Maddie asked, squeezing his fingers.

“Would you believe he organised the fucking movie night we went to?” Josh asked. It didn’t feel real, saying it out loud. What a fucking stupid coincidence.

Maddie’s eyes widened. “Jesus, really?”

“Yeah,” said Josh. He could talk about it, he realised. He could talk about the bad date just fine. “He, uh, said his ex was a big Mel Brooks fan.”

“Oh my god, he brought up his _ex_? On a _first date_?” It was the exact mix of horror and disbelief that Josh was feeling.

“Unbelievable, right?” He leaned over the armrest, far enough to press their shoulders together. “Absolutely unreal. I should’ve walked out then. Nevermind the breakdown.”

“Imagine if you could leave a Yelp review for dates,” said Maddie, meditatively. “One-star: mentioned his ex. One-star: he tried to show me fishing trip pictures.”

“One-star: ordered chicken in a seafood restaurant,” Josh offered. “One-star: beat me up in a park?” He wavered, unsure, but Maddie laughed. He felt his heart lift a little, which was a nice break from the nausea.

“Feel like that one should get zero-stars,” she replied. “Wouldn’t bring his average down far enough, only having integers.”

Josh bumped her shoulder again. “The concept’s still in development. We’ll put it in the elevator pitch.”

**Author's Note:**

> next up: a character we all know and love!
> 
> tumblr/twitter @dotsayers  
> suggested title from meg: 'haunting husband's of hollywood' [sic]  
> title from the orange by wendy cope, because friendship is magic


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